Thursday, July 19, 2012

Diary of a Real Pregnancy - Week 12: The Proof in the Ultrasound Pudding

The following is a real-life account of what it's like to be pregnant, week-by-week. None of this "It's a miraculous time" / "You are glowing" crap. No -- this is the real deal. Come on the crazy ride with me...

Week 12: The Proof in the Ultrasound Pudding

It's here! It's here! The toy catalog is here!

I mean... the week of our ultrasound is here!

Finally... finally we will get a chance to SEE inside my belly and omg, fingers crossed they don't put that probe on there and see a big black hole. Or something really... wrong. The things they tell you can happen when you're over the hill like I am (ie, over 35), or just in general.You really just never know until you see what you're dealing with, well, what you're dealing with.

Nerves aside, this is really a very exciting event. Ignoring the fact that I am the only woman in the waiting room who looks, for all intents and purposes, normal and not pregnant... Knowing that we could be seeing OUR BABY soon has me jumpy (in a good way). It's really at this point to that you realize just how invested you are in this whole thing... because goodness knows if they turn to you with That Look on their face and say, "There's a problem", or "I've got to go get the doctor", your whole world may come crashing down.

In our case, after being walked to a big, dark room full of equipment and monitors, and getting The Rundown of what they'll be looking for, what our risks are, and going through our family history again... Finally it's time. Holding breath. Crossing fingers.

And then... there it is. Clear as day, bouncing around, seemingly in someone else's body on some other planet. A baby. A real, live, real baby. Real.

It's real.

Holy crap it's real.

And I don't care how stoic you are or how many times you've done this, when you see that little thing, that little bit of life and magic, appear on the screen, it's like the world stops. You can breathe again. But oh, look! S/he has a head! And little legs! And omgitmustbeaboy, ohwait... that's the umbilical cord, haha! And now it's giddy time, watching this baby bounce and roll and meanwhile you're oblivious to any of it because you still can't feel anything. So.Weird.

Then it's the nitty gritty of checking and measuring and making sure all the parts that should be there are there. And they are. And they're beautiful.

12 week ultrasound
Babe at 12 weeks... so pretty!

Previous: Week 11: The Miracle of Maternity Pants
Next: Week 13: And Now the World Knows